How I started my meditation practice and found inner peace, love and abundance.
“Meditation is a way of entering into the quiet that’s already there”
— Deepak Chopra
You guys, can we talk about how freaking stressful life has been these days? With all of the political talk in the media, work layoffs, economy nose dives, and fear of the unknown, it’s no wonder that people who have never experienced anxiety before all of a sudden find themselves curled up in the fetal position waiting for the world to end. It’s really tough right now and so super scary.
I don’t know about y’all, but I’ve wanted to reach for the emergency bottle of wine in the back of the fridge on more than once occasion over the last six weeks. No shame. Here’s the only thing…that glass (or bottle) of wine is a very temporary fix. Moreover, that very temporary fix leaves me feeling gross once its effects have worn off. Not to mention the fact that the little guy in my belly probably wouldn’t appreciate it either.
So if wine isn’t the answer, then what’s a girl to do?
Over the last few years, I have slowly developed a consistent meditation practice that has been a complete game-changer for me. In fact, as a chronic anxiety-sufferer myself, I can’t imagine how I would’ve gotten through these crazy times without my practice. I know what you’re thinking, “I suck at meditating.” “There’s no way I can calm my mind like that.” “How do you just SIT there?!” If you’re wondering how I just managed to read your mind, it’s not because I’m psychic (though, a post on developing an intuitive practice might be interesting), it’s because I thought the same damn thing when someone first suggested meditation to me as a way to soothe my nagging anxiety. But my friends, if you’ll just give it a chance, I bet you’ll be just as pleasantly surprised as I was.
Check out my tips below to start your own practice RIGHT NOW!
Tip #1 – Find Your Place
Let me start by saying that you can literally meditate ANYWHERE. There are absolutely no rules here. I have meditated in my car after arriving early for a meeting. Sometimes I like to meditate in the bathtub or shower. I do find however, that I have a couple of favorite spots that I tend to gravitate toward, my bed, outside in the sunshine, and in my designated meditation corner.
When I was first starting my practice, I remember reading somewhere that it was a good idea to designate a specific place – somewhere that was just for meditating and nothing else. A sacred space of sorts. It could be anywhere, an entire room or just a little corner. The point is that when you’re starting out, it’s good to have a specific spot. As you get into the groove of your practice, each time you head to your meditation space, your brain will know what is coming next and will automatically start to prepare.
Tip #2 – Dress It Up
Once you’ve identified your meditation space, I invite you to make it your own. Add little touches that are unique to you – anything that you find soothing or peaceful. In my space, I chose a beautiful meditation pillow my mom got me for Christmas. It is full of jewel tone colors and mismatched patterns that I absolutely adore! She found mine at a little boutique in Panama City, but this one on Amazon definitely mimics its plush thickness. I also chose this super soft carpet to lay down in front of my pillow. On a small table beside me I have my favorite crystals, a couple of plants to add life and oxygen to my space, and a few incense and essential oils that always help me relax.
It’s not important that you go out and buy anything special for your meditation space to be effective. Use what you already have at home or shop second hand. There’s no need to add more stuff to your home if you already have items that will work. Just make sure that your space makes you feel comfortable and relaxed, everything else is just details and personal style!
Tip #3 – Set The Mood
Now that you have your meditation space set up the way you like it, let’s take a look at the atmosphere. For me, I like to put on a bit of music to set a relaxing mood for my practice. I use an app called Insight Timer and I LOVE it. With the free version, I have a great selection of tracks and I can easily find something that fits my mood and intention.
Next, I usually light a couple of candles (beeswax – no toxic parabens in this house) and burn an incense to polish off my ideal setting for meditation. Depending on my purpose for meditation, I may light a candle of a corresponding color and/or choose a particular useful incense to enhance my focus, but for daily practice I just grab whatever speaks to me. Just like your meditation space, setting the mood all boils down to personal preference. You may want a lot of ceremony involved, or you may want none at all. You may love background sounds like I do, or they may be too much. I encourage you to try different options and see what works best.
Tip #4 – Get Comfy
This one is important. To really be able to clear your mind and find peace through meditation, you have to be comfortable. If your clothing is bothersome or your butt is sore because of the hard surface you’re sitting on, you won’t be able to focus on anything else. Change into something comfy that you know won’t irritate you. I like leggings and a tank top or baggy sweatshirt myself, but whatever works for you is what you should choose. Your clothing isn’t the only thing you need to pay attention to when you’re thinking about comfort. Whether you choose to sit in a chair, on the ground, or lay down to meditate, it’s so important that your body is supported. Make sure that you aren’t feeling any pain or discomfort in your position, and if you are, make the proper adjustments before you get started.
Tip #5 – Set A Timer
If you’re wondering if there is a specific amount of time that you should be meditating each day, the answer is “no.” Why then am I telling you to set a timer? Simply put, if you’re anything like me, when you first begin a meditation practice you will likely only be able to sit still for a short period of time before you’re antsy and mentally tackling your ‘to do list’. When I first started this drove me insane. I felt like I was failing miserably because I couldn’t sit still for 30+ minutes, let alone keep my resident brain squirrels from wigging the eff out from lack of stimulation. It was a struggle, and I almost gave up because of it.
But then I read somewhere that setting a timer is a great way to slowly build up brain stamina for meditation. We’re all busy people, so sitting down on a meditation pillow for an undefined length of time is just asking for trouble. The key is to start out small, perhaps no more than 5 minutes at a time, and slowly build up to a longer meditation session. When you set a timer, your brain will know that there is an end in sight and therefore won’t be as likely to seek a way out of the stillness.
Tip #6 – Let Go Of Expectations
This tip kind of goes hand in hand with the last one. Go ahead and set your timer, but the moment you press the “start” button, you have to let go of all expectations. Do not be upset with yourself if you can’t stay focused. Do not get angry when your resident brain squirrels make an appearance, because they will. Do your best to acknowledge any thought, no matter how random it may be, and then let it go. The key is to not let it consume this time that you have set aside for YOU – this time that you DESERVE. Sometimes when something out of the blue drifts into my consciousness, I will silently say, “thank you for the reminder, I will get back to that later”, and let the thought drift right on out the same way it came in.
Even seasoned meditators have random thoughts. Trust me, it’s totally fine.
Tip #7 – Just Breathe
I am absolutely convinced that the reason meditation is so useful in the fight against my anxiety is because it has taught me how to use my breath to focus and create calm. Afterall, meditation is nothing without the breath work it encourages. There are plenty of different breathing methods that people swear by in their practice. For me, I like to keep it simple and in 3’s. Three seconds to breath in deeply, three seconds to hold the breath, three seconds to exhale, and three seconds to pause before starting the process all over again.
Each time I sit down on my meditation pillow and begin my practice, I silently count through each step in my mind. I probably spend the first two minutes of meditation that way before gradually easing away from my counting and allowing myself to slip into blissful peace and stillness. I have found that the initial counting actually helps me settle my mind and find my grove.
As with the other tips in this post, I urge you to try different techniques until you find what feels good to you.
Tip #8 – Try On Some “Extras”
“Extras? I thought we were talking about meditation, not the burrito bar at Chipotle.” Yes, yes, of course we are, but just like that delicious guac you always opt for, there are also “extras” that you can bring into your meditation practice. While mudras and mantras may not polish off the perfect burrito, they can add a delicious element to meditation. I’m not going to go into depth here, but I encourage you to do a bit of digging yourself. Check out some famous yogi’s or meditation teachers on YouTube and see what they’re up to.
Tip 8b – Consider Guided Meditation
If all else fails, don’t hesitate to try a guided meditation. This is a great example of an ‘extra’. When you’re first starting out and have no idea what you’re doing, guided meditation can show you the ropes. The Insight Timer app that I mentioned earlier has a wide array of guided options in addition to their background sounds and music. You can even search by theme so you can find exactly what you want.
Tip # 9 – Listen To The Space Between
Whether you believe in angels, spirit guides, or just your subconscious mind, it is undeniable that each of us has a little inner voice guiding us through life. I have found that I have been able to connect on a much deeper level with that voice through my meditation practice. During that brief, 3 second space between breaths, I find some of the best peace and guidance life has to offer. At the start of each meditation session, I always welcome my Guides, Angels, and Ancestors to be present with me. I make sure to tell them that I am open to communication and guidance in any way they see fit.
Tip #10 – Give Thanks
The time you spend in meditation is a blessing. It is your time to reconnect with God, Goddess, The Universe, All Knowing, etc., and it is something that you should be thankful for. Start and end your practice with a few words of gratitude. It’s a beautiful way to acknowledge your connection to the world around you.
Tip #11 – Repeat
This is the most important piece of advice that I can give to you. Repeat, repeat, REPEAT! Meditation isn’t a miracle drug that you can take one time and miraculously all your problems disappear. Just like anything else capable of making big changes in your life you have to be consistent and keep with it. I try to meditate for at least 10-15 minutes every day, but you will find what works for you. Maybe you’re okay with one longer meditation every couple of days, maybe you need a daily practice like I do. It’s not a one size fits all sort of thing.
I hope these tips are the inspiration you need to give meditation the old college try. Trust me, a good practice is the gift that keeps on giving.
Namaste my friend.